Return to Me Page 19

  It was after orgasm number five—or was that six?—that he rolled onto his back and, with a voice dripping with regret, explained that he needed to be in the office by ten a.m.

  “On a Sunday?” Ivana complained.

  “I promised Harrison that I would help him hammer out the last minute summaries for the case he’s presenting before Judge Reynolds tomorrow. It shouldn’t take more than two, three hours, tops.” He took her hand and placed a kiss in the center of her palm. “You can join us.”

  “I enjoy working at your law practice, but not on a Sunday,” she said. “Sienna’s been asking me to join her for brunch. I’ll call and see if she’s up for it.”

  They climbed out of bed and showered together, managing to get through it without tackling each other. Though, for Ivana, the temptation to pin Jonathan’s naked body against the shower’s stone wall and have her way with him was hard to fight.

  She was forced to put on the dress she’d worn to St. Francisville on Friday. It would be wonderful when all of her things were here. Now that she’d made the decision to move in with him, she was eager for it to happen.

  She borrowed Jonathan’s old Mercedes, which he kept as a backup car, and drove to her Granny Elise’s house to change into fresh clothes, then made the five minute drive to Satsuma Cafe to meet Sienna for brunch. Her sister was already there by the time Ivana made it to the back patio abounding with large, leafy plants and tables shaded by a huge oak tree.

  “Thanks for getting me out of that house,” her sister greeted, setting her drink down and standing to give Ivana a hug.

  The minute they sat, Sienna narrowed her eyes and leaned forward, peering at Ivana as if she were a foreign specimen under a microscope.

  “Why do you look like someone who just had morning sex?” Her sister’s accusatory voice would have been funny if it weren’t so annoying.

  Ivana rolled her eyes. “Can you please not?”

  Sienna gasped, her eyes and mouth both widening with delight. “You’ve been with Jonathan, haven’t you?”

  “Is there someone who can take my drink order?” Ivana asked, looking around and signaling for a table attendant.

  “Don’t try to change the subject?”

  “It would be nice if I can order my food before you start to grill me,” she said.

  The waiter arrived and Ivana ordered a curried chicken salad wrap, along with a glass of freshly-squeezed watermelon lemonade.

  The waiter hadn’t made it out of earshot before Sienna said, “Okay, spill it. And when I say it, I mean all of it. ”

  “What do you want me to say? Yes, I’ve seen Jonathan, okay?”

  “I know you’ve seen him. You’ve been working alongside him every day for the past few weeks. I want to know what else the two of you have been doing,” her sister prodded, plopping her elbow on the table and propping her chin in her hand. “Give me details. All of them.”

  “You’re not going to get all the details, so you can forget about that,” Ivana said, her cheeks heating under Sienna’s scrutiny.

  “I knew it!” her sister screeched. “Y’all did it!”

  “Okay, fine,” Ivana hissed. She looked around, making sure Sienna’s enthusiasm hadn’t garnered any stares. “Yes, Jonathan and I have been sleeping together,” she said. Goodness, she knew her cheeks must be red as a fire engine. “We’re going to move my things from Granny Elise’s place later today. He asked me to stay with him.”

  Sienna’s eyes bucked. “Oh, my goodness. Is this for real?”

  Ivana pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. “I think so,” she said with a nod. “It feels real.”

  “Oh, Vonnie, I’m so happy for you. For both of you.” She started to reach over for a hug, but then pulled back. “Wait.”

  “What?” Ivana asked.

  Sienna released a deep breath and flattened her palms on the table. “Okay, you know I’m on your side. Always. But I need you to be one hundred percent real with me. Are you going to flake out and pull another bullshit disappearing act again?”

  Ivana flinched.

  “You know I love you and I defended you even when you probably didn’t deserve it. But I hate what you did to Jonathan. And if you do it again, I’m not going to make excuses for you this time, Vonnie.”

  “I don’t expect you to,” Ivana said, surprised she could speak past the pain in her throat. “You should know better than to think I’d ever hurt Jonathan again.”

  “What about when you leave?” Sienna asked. “You’re sleeping with him, moving into his place? Do you really think he’s going to be okay once you go back to your relief work?”

  She could share her news with Sienna; divulge her plans not to return to Haiti. But she didn’t want to tell anyone before telling Jonathan. He should be the first to hear it. She owed him that much.

  “I will handle all of that when the time comes,” Ivana said. She reached across the table and took her sister’s hand. “I am not going to hurt him, Cee Cee. Trust me.”

  She’d never questioned Sienna’s loyalty, but the look in her sister’s eyes revealed just how much her support over the last three years was based on that loyalty, and not on approval of Ivana’s actions. It was more than apparent that if she pulled another cowardly disappearing act, she would lose her one true ally.

  There was no chance of that happening.

  Ivana was no longer considering moving to another city. She wanted to be here with her family. She wanted to be home.

  And this time she was here to stay.

  The Grand Ballroom at the Omni Royal Orleans Hotel was awash in green and gold silk bunting, Mackenna Arnold’s campaign colors. Large projection screens flanked either side of the dais that had been set up toward the rear wall. Towering balloon columns in green, gold, and white, with Mackenna Arnold for Mayor signs at the very top of them, were positioned throughout the room.

  The jovial mood coasting throughout the crowded space was contagious, giving Jonathan no choice but to share in the excitement. Mack had led in the polls from the very beginning of the mayoral race, but as the various precincts reported in, even the pundits were astounded by the size of the landslide victory taking place before their very eyes. New Orleans would have a black woman as its mayor, and Jonathan couldn’t be happier.

  Well, actually, he could be happier. This past week had proven that. Nothing made him happier than going to bed with Ivana at his side and waking up to find her still there. Even the knowledge of her imminent departure couldn’t squelch his joy.

  Because she would return. She hadn’t said it, but Jonathan felt it. He wasn’t sure how long it would take, but she couldn’t perform relief work forever. When the time came for her to hang up her hat, he would be here to welcome her back. Permanently.

  He could wait until she was ready to leave Haiti. He had no choice; it was either wait or live without her, and he’d decided there was no living without her anymore.

  Standing next to her right now, Jonathan wrapped one arm around her waist and gave her a squeeze.

  “Do you think your smile can get any wider?” he asked.

  “I doubt it,” she said with a laugh. “I am just so incredibly happy for this city. The people here are so lucky to have Mackenna Arnold to lead them into the future.”

  “She’s going to be amazing,” Jonathan said. He paused for a moment before adding, “Maybe you should think about sticking around so you can witness Mack’s marvelousness firsthand?”

  Her eyes glittered with mischief as she swung around to fully face him. “Funny you should say that.” She clasped her hands at the back of his neck. “I—”

  “Ivana?”

  They both turned, looking toward where someone had called her name. A woman who was almost as tall as Ivana, with a closely-shaved head and huge hoop earrings dangling from her lobes, came up to them.

  “Massey!” Ivana disengaged from her embrace with Jonathan and enveloped the woman in a hug.

  “I wondered if I would s
ee you here.” She returned Ivana’s hug. “How are you adjusting to being back home?”

  “It’s been lovely,” Ivana said. “It’s so good to see you! How are you?”

  “Relieved,” the older woman said. “As I’m sure everyone else is now that Ms. Arnold will officially be this city’s next mayor. I feel more comfortable with my daughter starting college here in the fall.”

  “Amen to that!” Ivana said. She turned to Jonathan. “Massey, this is Jonathan Campbell. Jonathan, this is Massey Jean-Julien. Massey launched a leadership academy for young girls in a small communal section of Port-Au-Prince.”

  “And Ivana here has been one of our most ardent supporters.” She took both of Ivana’s hands in hers. “I was surprised when Patience told me she finally convinced you to leave the island. I’m sorry to see you go, but you’ve put in your time, and then some. You’ll be missed, but I understand. No one can do that work forever.”

  “No. Umm…it does take a toll,” Ivana replied.

  Jonathan wasn’t sure what to make of the panic in her eyes. “No need to miss her too much. She’ll be back in Haiti soon enough,” he said.

  The woman looked to Ivana, a mask of befuddlement clouding her features. “You’re going back to Operation: Heal? I spoke with Patience just yesterday. She said you’d decided not to return.”

  Jonathan went completely still.

  “Let’s not get into that right now,” Ivana said. “We should be celebrating Mack’s win.”

  As if on cue, a roar went up, practically shaking the entire ballroom.

  “They’ve officially called it!” Massey Jean-Julien said, pumping both fists in the air.

  Everyone went wild, but the thoughts swirling around in his head wouldn’t allow Jonathan to join in the merriment.

  Ivana wasn’t going back to Haiti? She would no longer work with the relief group? When had she decided this? Was it between the time she left his bed this morning and tonight? Because if it was any time before that, she had a hell of a lot to answer for.

  “Do you have something you want to tell me?” Jonathan asked her.

  “Not now,” she said, her teeth clenched as she smiled at the room of celebrating supporters.

  “Then when, Ivana? When you leave to go…where? Help me out here.” He leaned toward her. “And why in the hell am I just hearing about this? How is it that your friend here knew you weren’t going back to Haiti and I didn’t? When did you decide this?”

  The look of guilt that flashed across her face provided the answer.

  “You knew all along, didn’t you? You knew you weren’t going back, and you let me think…”

  He couldn’t even finish the statement. Just when he’d started to trust her again. Just when he thought she trusted him enough to be open and honest with him.

  “I can’t believe you, Ivana. I can’t believe I fell for this shit again.”

  Jonathan pivoted on his heel and started walking toward the exit, swerving through the crowd of celebrating supporters. He burst through the French doors that led to the courtyard.

  “Jonathan!”

  He continued walking toward the far end of the hotel’s courtyard, ignoring her.

  “Would you please stop and listen!” Ivana called.

  He stopped and abruptly spun around to face her. “Listen to what? Do you actually have an explanation worth hearing?”

  “If you would give me a minute,” she said.

  Jonathan pulled in a calming breath. She was right; the least he could do was give her a chance to speak.

  “Okay,” he said. “I’m listening.”

  But she didn’t speak. She just stood there, staring at him.

  “Are you going to say something?” he asked.

  She ran a fidgeting hand through her hair, then tucked several wayward strands behind her ear. “I’m trying to figure out where to start,” she said.

  “Why don’t you start by explaining why you kept something like this from me?” Jonathan said, bracing his legs apart and folding his arms over his chest. “Was it supposed to be a surprise? Is that it?”

  “In a way, yes,” she said. “I was going to tell you tonight. Just moments before Massey interrupted us.”

  “How did she know about your plans before I did? How long have you known that you weren’t going back?”

  Her shoulders curled forward as she wrapped her arms around her chest, clutching her elbows.

  “I’ve been going back and forth about it for a few weeks,” she finally answered.

  “Weeks? And you didn’t think to mention it to me? Ivana, do you know the kind of emotional rollercoaster I’ve been on, trying to convince myself that I’ll be okay when you leave me again? Why would you let me go on believing that you were going back to Haiti at the end of this little sabbatical you’re supposedly on?”

  She held her hands out. “Because I wasn’t sure I was going to remain in New Orleans,” she said.

  Jonathan’s head snapped back.

  “I’ve been pretty certain that I wasn’t going to return to Haiti, or to any of Operation: Heal’s relief efforts, but I hadn’t made a decision about exactly where I would go.”

  “Where else would you live if not here?”

  She hunched her shoulders. “I don’t know. I mulled over a number of places: Houston, Atlanta, even Baton Rouge.”

  “An hour away? You’re actually considering moving just an hour away from here? And what? Were you going to just let me think that you were still living in another country? Was that your plan?”

  “Jonathan, a month ago you could barely stand to be around me. As of just a couple of weeks ago I was nothing but a temporary employee at your law firm,” she said. “I was still debating whether or not I could move back to New Orleans because I was unsure if I could stomach living here if we weren’t together. Do you know how heartbreaking it would be for me to live here and have to see you with other women?”

  “So now we’re worried about breaking hearts?” he said with a bitter laugh. “Yeah, I think I understand pretty well what it’s like to have your heart broken. You give good lessons on that.”

  She closed her eyes. “Jonathan,” she whispered. “Please, don’t do this.”

  He stared at her, wondering if he’d ever really known her at all.

  “Why must you always hold things back from me?” he asked. “Why can’t you trust me with the important things, Ivana? That’s what people who supposedly care about each other do, they fucking trust each other with the important stuff!”

  “I was going to tell you,” she said, holding her palms out. She opened her eyes and repeated. “I was going to tell you.”

  Jonathan pitched his head back and cursed up at the sky.

  “I’m not sure I believe you,” he said. He brought his eyes back to her, his anger growing with each moment that passed. “And that’s the problem. Your credibility wasn’t great to begin with after the shit you pulled three years ago. Now?” He had to take a minute before he could continue. “I vowed to never put myself in the position to have you hurt me again. I guess I can only blame myself for being foolish enough to trust you.”

  “Jonathan, please,” she whispered.

  But he didn’t want to hear any more. He turned and walked away.

  Chapter Twelve

  “Sam Nester from the assessor’s office is on line one.”

  Jonathan pressed the intercom button on his phone. “He’s probably looking for a campaign donation for the run-off election. Can you come up with an excuse, LaKeisha?”

  “That’s my job,” his receptionist said. “Although I’ve been doing it a lot more this morning. Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “I’m fine,” Jonathan said. “I’m just not in the mood to talk to Sam right now.”

  Or to anybody.

  Jonathan leaned back in his chair and rested his head against the headrest. He should have gone with his first mind and called in sick. For the amount of work he’d managed to do this morni
ng, he could have stayed home. That’s what Ivana had done.

  The fact that he’d been caught off guard when he’d walked into the office and been informed by LaKeisha that Ivana had called to say she wouldn’t be in the office today was a testament to just how quickly he’d allowed himself to forget that running this kind of disappearing act was her favorite pastime. He shouldn’t have been surprised.

  Yet, he had been surprised, because he knew how much she’d been looking forward to today. Jonathan planned to hand over the new advocacy program she’d developed to Nicolas. It had been her idea after Nicolas emailed last Thursday, letting Jonathan know he would be returning from his grandmother’s in Mexico.

  Ivana had worked countless hours last week, making sure everything was in order so that the transition would be seamless. He hadn’t thought she would allow what happened between them at Mack’s election night party to rob her of the joy of handing this project over to Nicolas.

  But, then again, she was a coward. She was still such a damn coward.

  No matter how diligently he tried, his mind could not fend off the image of her face when her friend Massey had let it slip that Ivana wasn’t planning to return to her relief aid group. He wanted to believe she had been only seconds from telling him, just as she’d claimed, but how could he ever be certain of anything when it came to her?

  Jonathan grimaced, shutting his eyes tight and clutching his stomach to staunch the pain Ivana had once again caused. He sucked in several long, measured breaths, slowly releasing them as he counted to ten. Why did she have to make things so damn hard? Why was it so difficult for her to give her whole self to him—to trust him?

  Was this how it would be for the rest of his life? Practicing breathing exercises to work through yet another painful episode at the hands of Ivana?

  He opened his eyes and stared straight ahead.

  “Yes,” he whispered.

  It was time he accepted that this was how it would be from now until he drew his last breath. Because he couldn’t not love her. Jonathan understood that now. It didn’t matter what she did or how much she hurt him, he was destined to love this stubborn, infuriating, enchantingly breathtaking woman forever.